I'm pretty sure every girl out there has once hoped to have a summer fling. Each year, June rolls around and we are bound and determined that this year we are going to fall in love. There's no question about it. Summer and love just go together. It only makes sense. Full of confidence, we say- Look out boys, you're about to fall head over heels for me whether you like it or not.
Unfortunately, by August, most of us are still sitting around waiting for our Danny Zukos to show up. We find ourselves looking back on the last two months wondering, "What happened?" Summer love was supposed to be easy to find!
I personally would like to blame Noah Calhoun from "The Notebook" for getting this romantic idea into our heads. And I quote, "When all is said and done, {summer romances} have one thing in common: They are shooting stars- a spectacular moment of light in the heavens, a fleeting glimpse of eternity."
Okay seriously, who wouldn't want to have a summer fling after that statement?
So my question is...where the heck are my shooting stars, lights in the heavens, and glimpses of eternity?
This summer hasn't exactly been the most romantic for me. I've gone on a couple dates here and there, but overall, it's been pretty boring. I'm fine with that I guess. However, the result is that I don't have many exciting posts to share. Hopefully this will change sometime in the near future, but for the time being, I will tell you about my recent adventures of being hit on as a secretary.
I don't know what it is, but I've recently discovered that guys are particularly interested in secretaries. Don't get me wrong, I would not object to this situation if these were normal, cute guys. But let me tell you, these guys are wierd. Some are just awkward, others think they are hot stuff, and occasionally they are straight up crazy.
Most recently, it's been the crazy type.
A few weeks ago, this crazy Indian guy (we'll call him Sunny D) who thinks he's black started coming into work to talk to me. Picture a short Indian guy wearing baggy jeans, a tall T, and gold chain necklace. He comes in walking like he thinks he's got swagger, with his ipod turned up so loud that he's literally shouting at everyone because he can't hear. He has a giant empty can of Sunny D hooked onto his necklace. I don't know what was in that Sunny D, but I seriously think he was on something.
The first thing he said to me was, "YO! Where your restrooms at? I gotta change, but you'll see I clean up real gooood." He then goes and changes into something a little more normal and comes back. "See I was dirty, but now I hot huh? I bet you think I look reaalll nice now."
He's now come in like 5 or 6 times and he says the most ridiculous and awkward things. I'll just give you a few of my favorite Sunny D quotes.
When I asked him his name he replied, "Oh what's my name? What's MY name? Girl, you wanna know my name? I'm Sunny D. Awww ya." (I really wish I could tell you what he actually calls himself. So much funnier haha)
"So what is it that you do here? Girl, you have got to have THE most boring job in the world. Do you even do anything?" -Insulting my job is one of his favorite things to do.
"So girl, uh what is your major? Ya know, like what is it that you study? Do you like to study? I like to study A LOT."
"Have you seen all those EFY kids runnin round? I feel like I'm in a toy store but I can't play with any of the toys." -Umm, does he realize how inappropriate that just sounded? DatingRule #57: Don't suggest to the girl you are trying to flirt with that you areactually a pedophile.
"Ta-day I didn't know it was a holiday. I went to class and there wasn't nobody anywhere. I swear I saw Brigham Young's ghost! Freaked me out yo."
"I didn't know how to celebrate the 24th. I didn't know if I was s'posed to go ta the temple or go out partyin with ma friends. But don't worry, I don't drink or nothin, see I got on my CTR ring."
So there you go. Not exactly a summer romance or even a dating story, but still entertaining at least!
-The Cautious Charmer
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