The weekend upDATE.

Sorry, punny title. I couldn't help myself.

It's been proven to me yet again the complete truth of the phrase "when it rains, it pours." This past weekend was one such example.

I have not been on a date in over 2 months (I realize this is not a significantly long amount of time, but it is an obvious break in my dating life), and the all of the sudden I was asked out on 2 dates on Saturday. Who are the current interests, might you ask? One is, of course, the ever-present Samwise who asked me on the first official date in the history of our friendship, and then enter a new character in the story, The Teddy Bear. Both of these men are absolutely fantastic and I'm pretty sure I could be in love with either of them.

The Teddy Bear is a man whom I have known for over 6 months and he is one of those people that you just feel completely comfortable and open with at all times. He is just so caring and a great listener and honest to goodness one of the funniest men I have ever encountered.  And he is just like a teddy bear: big and cuddly and makes you feel good about yourself. I've never really had any interest in him, until he asked me on a date and my brain was like, "Hold on, what? Hecks yeah. Let's do this." Seriously, one of the best, most simple dates ever. We got sushi and went to an archery range. Let me repeat: WE GOT SUSHI AND WENT TO AN ARCHERY RANGE. Yeah, he's got to be my soul mate or something. This was an outrageously fun date and I didn't want it to end. I want him to ask me on another!

And then Samwise... Oh Samwise. I'm sick of him. But I love him oh so much. His infectious laugh and adorable red hair are too much for me to handle. I seriously don't know what to do about this boy. He asked me on a date to his office Christmas party. However I kind of am terrified that the reason he asked me is because his best friend wanted to ask my roommate and he figured it would just be fun if roommates went with roommates on this date. That sounds like a very negative approach to this situation, but honestly that's what it feels like: we are such good friends that he feels like it doesn't mean anything to take me on this date and he's just doing it to help out his friend.

Kissing... Who knew right?

Remember in my last post how I mentioned that I have never had a romantic relationship? Well.. up until last summer that also translated into kissing. I know, I know. Kind of crazy. I went 21 years of my life without kissing anyone.

And then I went to Italy.

There I was, a little innocent, fresh-eyed American, just strolling through the markets in Florence with my mother. Now, these markets are amazing. You can get such good deals on everything! Plus I LOVE their scarves. So I was searching for a leather jacket. These jackets were ridiculously good looking. I really wanted one. And then the vendor started trying to convince me to buy one. To preface it, these jackets are at least $120. And I did not have that sort of money. So what do you do? You bargain. My mom got tired of me trying to convince him, so she went to the next vendor. So here I am, bargaining for a good deal on an amazing jacket when all of the sudden... the vendor kisses me! And it was not just a little smooch. It was a full on passionate kiss. (on his part. Although he was pretty attractive.) I was flipping out. Little innocent me didn't know what to do! So I finally separated myself from him and I just walked away. I had no idea what was happening. It was all a blur. I went to find my mother and the first thing that I said to her was "WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?" And that was that.

Now, I have only ever kissed three people. And here are the other stories.

The next kiss wasn't really anything. In fact, you have already heard the story. Squints was my second kiss. One that I shared with two of my best friends. It was a strange night indeed. (No, I was not the tall gorgeous one that he wanted to kiss.) And like the Friendly Kisser, I had a thing for volleyball boys. So of course I would kiss him. 'Nuff said.

The third story however is what takes the cake.

I recently moved to a different city. I knew nobody in this town. Until I found out that I had some second cousins here. They were boys around my same age and pretty fun to hang out with. Now my roommate and I had just bought a TV and we wanted to have a party to break it in. So I invited my cousin and his friends to come join us. They showed up around 8 or so and we started to play Super Smash Bros. (A favorite of mine.) We quit playing around midnight, so they could leave and go home, but that was not to be. They saw that I had Inception and they wanted to watch it right that moment. So we watched the movie, then we just sat and laughed about nothing until around 4. By this time, my roommate was asleep, one of the boys was asleep on the floor. And the other 4 of us remained semi-conscious. So two of the boys, my cousin and his friend, sat on one couch, while myself and The Ripped One, sat on the other. We decided to start another movie. Genius. Basically what happened was that everyone fell asleep. And then after the movie finished, the other friend fell asleep on the floor, my cousin went and stole my bed, and then The Ripped One stole my half of the couch, so I took his half. Then I was freezing. And what do you know? The only blanket semi-available was being used by the Ripped One.

It was now 7 in the morning. We were sharing a blanket. He was gorgeous (and ripped). What would you do in this situation? Well I probably could have made a smarter choice but... oh well. We started playing footsies. And one thing led to another and we ended up making out. Wait, what? His best friends were asleep on the floor, my cousin was in the other room, and there we were making out. Stranger things have happened I guess... Since then, have I really talked to him? Occasionally. But apparently he got a girlfriend a couple of weeks after. So. NCMO. Yay. Also another thing to mention. He is only 19. He was a freshman when I was a senior. It appears I have a thing for young ones....

So these are my kissing stories. All three of them. And each one of them is absolutely ridiculous.

Hope never fails?

You must all be thinking, why would an Observer want to be a part of a love blog? Very good question. In all honesty, your guess is as good as mine. Maybe you all can learn from my mistakes. In my many years on this earth, not once have I had a single romantic relationship. Sure there may have been times that it was leading towards that, but in the end everything just sort of failed. 

Because of the failures, I keep thinking things like: what is wrong with me? Am I just not good enough? Am I too weird? Too crazy and immature at times? Too much like one of the guys? (These are venomous thoughts. Never think them. They mess with your head. Case and point.) 

Well... We may never know the answers. 

But I have been privy to seeing many relationships. (Ergo the name.) Each one is VERY different but all are educational. From other's experiences, I get to see what I will eventually want and will not want in a relationship. The one thing that terrifies me most is that someday I will end up settling. I have seen many couples settle because they think that nothing better will come. I start to think that those people might be me in a couple of years. But the one thing that keeps me going is hope. 

"Hope guides me, that is what gets me through the day and especially the night." -Knight's Tale

The hope that one day, I will find that someone who will make me laugh. Who will make me want to be a better person. The person that I can grow old with.  

But until then... Here's to hoping!

"To be fond of dancing was a certain step towards falling in love"

This quote from Pride and Prejudice ought to be the theme of my love life. A man's attractive level increases ten-fold when he is willing to dance. I'm not even talking good, choreographed dancing. This is good old fashioned dance party breaking it down and thrashing and moving like crazy. I don't care if he is good at dancing... that is not what is important here. It is the principle behind the willingness to go to a dance party that I find attractive: the lack of self-consciousness, the confidence to be crazy and flail about, and the willingness to let loose and have fun. In my eyes, these are some of the most amazing qualities that a man can possess. And men rarely do possess them.

Rarely do I find a man willing to dance with me. And the few who are willing, often they are fun to dance with for brief moments and then get bored to quickly or turn out to be tools beyond belief. Is it too much to ask for a boy who is willing to be crazy and ridiculous with me? I suppose one can be both of those characteristics and still not be fond of dancing. But it is definitely is much easier to discern their personality when they are laying it all out on the dance floor.

So gents: come one, come all and dance with me! Let us hit up all the clubs and crash all the house parties together and fall deeply, madly, and dancingly in love.