Sorry, punny title. I couldn't help myself.
It's been proven to me yet again the complete truth of the phrase "when it rains, it pours." This past weekend was one such example.
I have not been on a date in over 2 months (I realize this is not a significantly long amount of time, but it is an obvious break in my dating life), and the all of the sudden I was asked out on 2 dates on Saturday. Who are the current interests, might you ask? One is, of course, the ever-present Samwise who asked me on the first official date in the history of our friendship, and then enter a new character in the story, The Teddy Bear. Both of these men are absolutely fantastic and I'm pretty sure I could be in love with either of them.
The Teddy Bear is a man whom I have known for over 6 months and he is one of those people that you just feel completely comfortable and open with at all times. He is just so caring and a great listener and honest to goodness one of the funniest men I have ever encountered. And he is just like a teddy bear: big and cuddly and makes you feel good about yourself. I've never really had any interest in him, until he asked me on a date and my brain was like, "Hold on, what? Hecks yeah. Let's do this." Seriously, one of the best, most simple dates ever. We got sushi and went to an archery range. Let me repeat: WE GOT SUSHI AND WENT TO AN ARCHERY RANGE. Yeah, he's got to be my soul mate or something. This was an outrageously fun date and I didn't want it to end. I want him to ask me on another!
And then Samwise... Oh Samwise. I'm sick of him. But I love him oh so much. His infectious laugh and adorable red hair are too much for me to handle. I seriously don't know what to do about this boy. He asked me on a date to his office Christmas party. However I kind of am terrified that the reason he asked me is because his best friend wanted to ask my roommate and he figured it would just be fun if roommates went with roommates on this date. That sounds like a very negative approach to this situation, but honestly that's what it feels like: we are such good friends that he feels like it doesn't mean anything to take me on this date and he's just doing it to help out his friend.
Monday, December 16, 2013
Friday, November 29, 2013
Kissing... Who knew right?
Remember in my last post how I mentioned that I have never had a romantic relationship? Well.. up until last summer that also translated into kissing. I know, I know. Kind of crazy. I went 21 years of my life without kissing anyone.
And then I went to Italy.
There I was, a little innocent, fresh-eyed American, just strolling through the markets in Florence with my mother. Now, these markets are amazing. You can get such good deals on everything! Plus I LOVE their scarves. So I was searching for a leather jacket. These jackets were ridiculously good looking. I really wanted one. And then the vendor started trying to convince me to buy one. To preface it, these jackets are at least $120. And I did not have that sort of money. So what do you do? You bargain. My mom got tired of me trying to convince him, so she went to the next vendor. So here I am, bargaining for a good deal on an amazing jacket when all of the sudden... the vendor kisses me! And it was not just a little smooch. It was a full on passionate kiss. (on his part. Although he was pretty attractive.) I was flipping out. Little innocent me didn't know what to do! So I finally separated myself from him and I just walked away. I had no idea what was happening. It was all a blur. I went to find my mother and the first thing that I said to her was "WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?" And that was that.
Now, I have only ever kissed three people. And here are the other stories.
The next kiss wasn't really anything. In fact, you have already heard the story. Squints was my second kiss. One that I shared with two of my best friends. It was a strange night indeed. (No, I was not the tall gorgeous one that he wanted to kiss.) And like the Friendly Kisser, I had a thing for volleyball boys. So of course I would kiss him. 'Nuff said.
The third story however is what takes the cake.
I recently moved to a different city. I knew nobody in this town. Until I found out that I had some second cousins here. They were boys around my same age and pretty fun to hang out with. Now my roommate and I had just bought a TV and we wanted to have a party to break it in. So I invited my cousin and his friends to come join us. They showed up around 8 or so and we started to play Super Smash Bros. (A favorite of mine.) We quit playing around midnight, so they could leave and go home, but that was not to be. They saw that I had Inception and they wanted to watch it right that moment. So we watched the movie, then we just sat and laughed about nothing until around 4. By this time, my roommate was asleep, one of the boys was asleep on the floor. And the other 4 of us remained semi-conscious. So two of the boys, my cousin and his friend, sat on one couch, while myself and The Ripped One, sat on the other. We decided to start another movie. Genius. Basically what happened was that everyone fell asleep. And then after the movie finished, the other friend fell asleep on the floor, my cousin went and stole my bed, and then The Ripped One stole my half of the couch, so I took his half. Then I was freezing. And what do you know? The only blanket semi-available was being used by the Ripped One.
It was now 7 in the morning. We were sharing a blanket. He was gorgeous (and ripped). What would you do in this situation? Well I probably could have made a smarter choice but... oh well. We started playing footsies. And one thing led to another and we ended up making out. Wait, what? His best friends were asleep on the floor, my cousin was in the other room, and there we were making out. Stranger things have happened I guess... Since then, have I really talked to him? Occasionally. But apparently he got a girlfriend a couple of weeks after. So. NCMO. Yay. Also another thing to mention. He is only 19. He was a freshman when I was a senior. It appears I have a thing for young ones....
So these are my kissing stories. All three of them. And each one of them is absolutely ridiculous.
And then I went to Italy.
There I was, a little innocent, fresh-eyed American, just strolling through the markets in Florence with my mother. Now, these markets are amazing. You can get such good deals on everything! Plus I LOVE their scarves. So I was searching for a leather jacket. These jackets were ridiculously good looking. I really wanted one. And then the vendor started trying to convince me to buy one. To preface it, these jackets are at least $120. And I did not have that sort of money. So what do you do? You bargain. My mom got tired of me trying to convince him, so she went to the next vendor. So here I am, bargaining for a good deal on an amazing jacket when all of the sudden... the vendor kisses me! And it was not just a little smooch. It was a full on passionate kiss. (on his part. Although he was pretty attractive.) I was flipping out. Little innocent me didn't know what to do! So I finally separated myself from him and I just walked away. I had no idea what was happening. It was all a blur. I went to find my mother and the first thing that I said to her was "WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?" And that was that.
Now, I have only ever kissed three people. And here are the other stories.
The next kiss wasn't really anything. In fact, you have already heard the story. Squints was my second kiss. One that I shared with two of my best friends. It was a strange night indeed. (No, I was not the tall gorgeous one that he wanted to kiss.) And like the Friendly Kisser, I had a thing for volleyball boys. So of course I would kiss him. 'Nuff said.
The third story however is what takes the cake.
I recently moved to a different city. I knew nobody in this town. Until I found out that I had some second cousins here. They were boys around my same age and pretty fun to hang out with. Now my roommate and I had just bought a TV and we wanted to have a party to break it in. So I invited my cousin and his friends to come join us. They showed up around 8 or so and we started to play Super Smash Bros. (A favorite of mine.) We quit playing around midnight, so they could leave and go home, but that was not to be. They saw that I had Inception and they wanted to watch it right that moment. So we watched the movie, then we just sat and laughed about nothing until around 4. By this time, my roommate was asleep, one of the boys was asleep on the floor. And the other 4 of us remained semi-conscious. So two of the boys, my cousin and his friend, sat on one couch, while myself and The Ripped One, sat on the other. We decided to start another movie. Genius. Basically what happened was that everyone fell asleep. And then after the movie finished, the other friend fell asleep on the floor, my cousin went and stole my bed, and then The Ripped One stole my half of the couch, so I took his half. Then I was freezing. And what do you know? The only blanket semi-available was being used by the Ripped One.
It was now 7 in the morning. We were sharing a blanket. He was gorgeous (and ripped). What would you do in this situation? Well I probably could have made a smarter choice but... oh well. We started playing footsies. And one thing led to another and we ended up making out. Wait, what? His best friends were asleep on the floor, my cousin was in the other room, and there we were making out. Stranger things have happened I guess... Since then, have I really talked to him? Occasionally. But apparently he got a girlfriend a couple of weeks after. So. NCMO. Yay. Also another thing to mention. He is only 19. He was a freshman when I was a senior. It appears I have a thing for young ones....
So these are my kissing stories. All three of them. And each one of them is absolutely ridiculous.
Saturday, November 23, 2013
Hope never fails?
You must all be thinking, why would an Observer want to be a part of a love blog? Very good question. In all honesty, your guess is as good as mine. Maybe you all can learn from my mistakes. In my many years on this earth, not once have I had a single romantic relationship. Sure there may have been times that it was leading towards that, but in the end everything just sort of failed.
Because of the failures, I keep thinking things like: what is wrong with me? Am I just not good enough? Am I too weird? Too crazy and immature at times? Too much like one of the guys? (These are venomous thoughts. Never think them. They mess with your head. Case and point.)
Well... We may never know the answers.
But I have been privy to seeing many relationships. (Ergo the name.) Each one is VERY different but all are educational. From other's experiences, I get to see what I will eventually want and will not want in a relationship. The one thing that terrifies me most is that someday I will end up settling. I have seen many couples settle because they think that nothing better will come. I start to think that those people might be me in a couple of years. But the one thing that keeps me going is hope.
"Hope guides me, that is what gets me through the day and especially the night." -Knight's Tale
The hope that one day, I will find that someone who will make me laugh. Who will make me want to be a better person. The person that I can grow old with.
But until then... Here's to hoping!
Because of the failures, I keep thinking things like: what is wrong with me? Am I just not good enough? Am I too weird? Too crazy and immature at times? Too much like one of the guys? (These are venomous thoughts. Never think them. They mess with your head. Case and point.)
Well... We may never know the answers.
But I have been privy to seeing many relationships. (Ergo the name.) Each one is VERY different but all are educational. From other's experiences, I get to see what I will eventually want and will not want in a relationship. The one thing that terrifies me most is that someday I will end up settling. I have seen many couples settle because they think that nothing better will come. I start to think that those people might be me in a couple of years. But the one thing that keeps me going is hope.
"Hope guides me, that is what gets me through the day and especially the night." -Knight's Tale
The hope that one day, I will find that someone who will make me laugh. Who will make me want to be a better person. The person that I can grow old with.
But until then... Here's to hoping!
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
"To be fond of dancing was a certain step towards falling in love"
This quote from Pride and Prejudice ought to be the theme of my love life. A man's attractive level increases ten-fold when he is willing to dance. I'm not even talking good, choreographed dancing. This is good old fashioned dance party breaking it down and thrashing and moving like crazy. I don't care if he is good at dancing... that is not what is important here. It is the principle behind the willingness to go to a dance party that I find attractive: the lack of self-consciousness, the confidence to be crazy and flail about, and the willingness to let loose and have fun. In my eyes, these are some of the most amazing qualities that a man can possess. And men rarely do possess them.
Rarely do I find a man willing to dance with me. And the few who are willing, often they are fun to dance with for brief moments and then get bored to quickly or turn out to be tools beyond belief. Is it too much to ask for a boy who is willing to be crazy and ridiculous with me? I suppose one can be both of those characteristics and still not be fond of dancing. But it is definitely is much easier to discern their personality when they are laying it all out on the dance floor.
So gents: come one, come all and dance with me! Let us hit up all the clubs and crash all the house parties together and fall deeply, madly, and dancingly in love.
Rarely do I find a man willing to dance with me. And the few who are willing, often they are fun to dance with for brief moments and then get bored to quickly or turn out to be tools beyond belief. Is it too much to ask for a boy who is willing to be crazy and ridiculous with me? I suppose one can be both of those characteristics and still not be fond of dancing. But it is definitely is much easier to discern their personality when they are laying it all out on the dance floor.
So gents: come one, come all and dance with me! Let us hit up all the clubs and crash all the house parties together and fall deeply, madly, and dancingly in love.
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Those dang leeches
GUYS. I just got the best advice ever from the Legend of Korra (yes, nerdy cartoons are my thing): "Ending a relationship is kind of like pulling off a blood sucking leech. You've just got to rip it off and get it over with. You'll feel a lot better afterwards, trust me."
Truth. Amen. Hallelujah.
So I came to the dramatic and horrible realization that I am terrible at relationship communication, right? Well, it's still going down. Everyday I am haunted by the knowledge that I desperately need to talk to The Youngin' and maybe even Samwise. For my own sanity as much as for theirs. But I still haven't done so and I'm so sad about it.
My conversation with The Youngin' is not going to be enjoyable, but its going to make me feel a ton better. It will hopefully give him the closure he needs as well.
Just rip that dang leech off.
Truth. Amen. Hallelujah.
So I came to the dramatic and horrible realization that I am terrible at relationship communication, right? Well, it's still going down. Everyday I am haunted by the knowledge that I desperately need to talk to The Youngin' and maybe even Samwise. For my own sanity as much as for theirs. But I still haven't done so and I'm so sad about it.
My conversation with The Youngin' is not going to be enjoyable, but its going to make me feel a ton better. It will hopefully give him the closure he needs as well.
Just rip that dang leech off.
Sunday, October 27, 2013
Lack of communication. My bad.
I am the worst.
My eyes have been opened to how entirely terrible I am at handling dating situations and relationships. I am incapable of discussing my feelings and my intentions with a gentleman of interest. When in the company of my roommates or my mother, I can rant all day about how frustrated I am or about how I feel about someone, but the second the gentleman in question is present, I can not speak of such things. At all. It really is ridiculous.
I'm sure you can deduce that I have yet to speak to The Youngin'. I am unintentionally letting it just fizzle away, which is completely unacceptable. I know I need to speak with him, but I have yet to find the words or the courage or the desire.
And now I have some words that I need to speak to Samwise, but I can not for the life of me say them to his face. I have not mentioned Samwise to you, my dear readers, which is rather unfortunate because he is the dearest, most loyal, surprisingly spontaneous boy that I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. I met him back in May, and we have been incredible friends ever since. I've had a crush on him on and off for the last 4 months. Here's the catch: he has a missionary. A girl who still has nearly a year before she gets home, but he is still in love with her and absolutely wants to marry her when she returns... Yeah, again with the whole, "Friendly Kisser can't ever have a normal dating situation" thing.
Long story short: Samwise and I kissed in July and then NEVER TALKED ABOUT IT (yes,I have a problem), and then everything went back to normal and we were still just friends. It has been as such for months now, but then last week he called me just to talk and invited me to hang out every single day. What?!
Don't call me and be an absolute sweetheart when I already like you but we both know that nothing is ever going to happen between us.
Annoyed.
And this, my friends, is where communication comes into play. It would be so much clearer if I could just ask him what was going on in his mind and if I could verbalize what is going on in mine. And this is where I struggle and things fall apart. How have I never realized how miserable I am at this?! I need some communication skills.
My eyes have been opened to how entirely terrible I am at handling dating situations and relationships. I am incapable of discussing my feelings and my intentions with a gentleman of interest. When in the company of my roommates or my mother, I can rant all day about how frustrated I am or about how I feel about someone, but the second the gentleman in question is present, I can not speak of such things. At all. It really is ridiculous.
I'm sure you can deduce that I have yet to speak to The Youngin'. I am unintentionally letting it just fizzle away, which is completely unacceptable. I know I need to speak with him, but I have yet to find the words or the courage or the desire.
And now I have some words that I need to speak to Samwise, but I can not for the life of me say them to his face. I have not mentioned Samwise to you, my dear readers, which is rather unfortunate because he is the dearest, most loyal, surprisingly spontaneous boy that I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. I met him back in May, and we have been incredible friends ever since. I've had a crush on him on and off for the last 4 months. Here's the catch: he has a missionary. A girl who still has nearly a year before she gets home, but he is still in love with her and absolutely wants to marry her when she returns... Yeah, again with the whole, "Friendly Kisser can't ever have a normal dating situation" thing.
Long story short: Samwise and I kissed in July and then NEVER TALKED ABOUT IT (yes,I have a problem), and then everything went back to normal and we were still just friends. It has been as such for months now, but then last week he called me just to talk and invited me to hang out every single day. What?!
Don't call me and be an absolute sweetheart when I already like you but we both know that nothing is ever going to happen between us.
Annoyed.
And this, my friends, is where communication comes into play. It would be so much clearer if I could just ask him what was going on in his mind and if I could verbalize what is going on in mine. And this is where I struggle and things fall apart. How have I never realized how miserable I am at this?! I need some communication skills.
Tuesday, October 15, 2013
Not Funny.
Aaaaaand we're back... or at least I am.
It's been a long, arduous break from love-blogging, but the time has come where I feel the need to begin again. I can not say the same for my fellow writers, but maybe someday they will come back and tell you there stories. Or maybe not, who knows.
So it's been a solid 5 to 6 months since I last updated on my love life. But don't worry, I haven't fallen madly in love, so you haven't missed too much. I did have a summer full of boy situations and kissing - I try to keep things as exciting as possible. Someday I may share some of the stories from this summer, as they are pretty entertaining, but for now I must tell you about The Youngin'.
Okay, so this boy is not THAT much younger than me, only a year and some change. I mean, it's nothing like when I kissed Squints and then found out he was only 17. There are many guys I know that are a year younger than me and it wouldn't bother me one bit, but for some reason The Youngin' just seems SO YOUNG.
I've been (kind of?) dating him for the last 3 weeks. "Kind of" meaning that we've spent loads of time together and kissed and all that jazz, but haven't really ever talked about it.
How typical of me.
This time we've spent together has been enjoyable. We are very similar in our interests and our opinions. We both look at the world in a very similar manner, which is refreshing and has lead to some very deep, philosophical discussions. But I've been very hesitant about the whole thing because of his age and because sometimes when we're talking, he just seems so young and immature. And then about 4 days ago I came to the most game changing realization:
HE IS BORING!
No really, he is. How I went for 3 weeks without realizing this, I still am not positive. It is potentially because I have so much hilarity and personality, that I can pretty much make up for any lack that a person has. But you know what I finally realized? He has never made me really laugh. Maybe calling The Youngin' boring is drastic, but I honestly can't recall a time when I've really been excited or thrilled to be around him. The real problem that I have with him is that he doesn't laugh at my jokes! The other day, I was just talking like normal with my roommate and we were dying of laughter, and The Youngin' was just sitting there, not laughing, and making me feel dumb. Multiple times he commented on how crazy we were being and how we were "odd." Not a fan.
To me, sense of humor is the biggest selling point in a guy. It's so important for me because I laugh more than most anyone I know, so when he doesn't make me laugh and doesn't laugh with me, then I have a serious problem. And such is the case with this boy.
So what do I do now? How do I just tell a boy that I don't want to date him because I find him dull? I obviously can't tell him that, but I don't know how to speak my mind otherwise. Oh, and did I mention that I was the first girl he ever kissed, which makes me even more hesitant to break things off and break his tender little heart? Bah!
It's been a long, arduous break from love-blogging, but the time has come where I feel the need to begin again. I can not say the same for my fellow writers, but maybe someday they will come back and tell you there stories. Or maybe not, who knows.
So it's been a solid 5 to 6 months since I last updated on my love life. But don't worry, I haven't fallen madly in love, so you haven't missed too much. I did have a summer full of boy situations and kissing - I try to keep things as exciting as possible. Someday I may share some of the stories from this summer, as they are pretty entertaining, but for now I must tell you about The Youngin'.
Okay, so this boy is not THAT much younger than me, only a year and some change. I mean, it's nothing like when I kissed Squints and then found out he was only 17. There are many guys I know that are a year younger than me and it wouldn't bother me one bit, but for some reason The Youngin' just seems SO YOUNG.
I've been (kind of?) dating him for the last 3 weeks. "Kind of" meaning that we've spent loads of time together and kissed and all that jazz, but haven't really ever talked about it.
How typical of me.
This time we've spent together has been enjoyable. We are very similar in our interests and our opinions. We both look at the world in a very similar manner, which is refreshing and has lead to some very deep, philosophical discussions. But I've been very hesitant about the whole thing because of his age and because sometimes when we're talking, he just seems so young and immature. And then about 4 days ago I came to the most game changing realization:
HE IS BORING!
No really, he is. How I went for 3 weeks without realizing this, I still am not positive. It is potentially because I have so much hilarity and personality, that I can pretty much make up for any lack that a person has. But you know what I finally realized? He has never made me really laugh. Maybe calling The Youngin' boring is drastic, but I honestly can't recall a time when I've really been excited or thrilled to be around him. The real problem that I have with him is that he doesn't laugh at my jokes! The other day, I was just talking like normal with my roommate and we were dying of laughter, and The Youngin' was just sitting there, not laughing, and making me feel dumb. Multiple times he commented on how crazy we were being and how we were "odd." Not a fan.
To me, sense of humor is the biggest selling point in a guy. It's so important for me because I laugh more than most anyone I know, so when he doesn't make me laugh and doesn't laugh with me, then I have a serious problem. And such is the case with this boy.
So what do I do now? How do I just tell a boy that I don't want to date him because I find him dull? I obviously can't tell him that, but I don't know how to speak my mind otherwise. Oh, and did I mention that I was the first girl he ever kissed, which makes me even more hesitant to break things off and break his tender little heart? Bah!
Friday, May 24, 2013
Happy :)
At the end of my last post, I was planning on writing a second installment for the Smalls saga. However, since then I have realized that I'm not particularly interested in posting my relationship all over the internet. Okay, it's only one blog, but still.
All you really need to know is that I am in love with Smalls, and I'm beyond happy about that :)
Thats all for now :)
-The Cautious Charmer
All you really need to know is that I am in love with Smalls, and I'm beyond happy about that :)
Thats all for now :)
-The Cautious Charmer
Friday, May 17, 2013
What is normal?
Just today I swear I have started about 4 different blog posts, but I just don't know what to say. It's not that things are happening that I just don't know how to put into words. No, no - exactly the opposite probably - nothing is really happening, though everything humanly possible is happening in my head. And THAT is why I can not figure out what I want to say.
Here are some of the post first lines I've tried out today:
Let me take the moment to be a realist...
Life is a funny thing....
There comes a point in every single person's life when they realize that every person they know is in a relationship, married, on a mission, or having babies....
Let me try one more time:
As was mentioned last post, I just moved into a new house. I like to think that I'm really outgoing and good with meeting new people, but I just moved from an apartment complex where I lived for years and have not had the need to meet an entirely new group of people. This move has made me realize that this is a skill I seem to have forgotten. The last week or two have required me to go out and meet people and hone in on my get-to-know-you skills. And let me tell you, I have met some wonderful humans. There are so many people that I just want to get to know better, specifically boys, of course. There aren't any boys that I have specific stories with yet, but I feel I will soon enough.
But let me tell you about a slight interest I have in The Boy Next Door. As I'm sure you can deduce, he lives next door to my new house. And he is a sweet heart. And he is super attractive. I've talked to him a couple of times, and the time just flies by and he's so easy to talk to. Yeah, it's pretty easy for me to have a crush on him right now. But I can never just have a normal crush, oh no, apparently there must always be a twist... so I naturally am interested in the boy that one of my new roommates is in love with.
Naturally.
There is a lot of story between my roommate and the Boy Next Door, but suffice it to say that I really don't think anything will happen between them, but I don't think my roommate is fully aware of that. But I'm not one to go stepping on toes and making people mad by going after someone they are interested in. So I'm stuck in this place where I totally want to get to know him and see if I would want to date him, but I know that I definitely can not go there.
Why can't my life consist of normal dating situations?!
But then again, is there such a thing as a normal dating situation? Yeah, probably not.
Monday, May 6, 2013
Nothing beats a good old-fashioned non-date
Since all three of my fellow blog writers are dating boys... (whoops, spoiler alert on Miss Inconsistent's life) Anyway, since they are all dating away and busy with that, I have taken it upon myself to be the source of exciting dating/boy stories. I mean, as much fun as it is to have a healthy and successful relationship, it's not exactly conducive to telling dramatic stories on a dating blog, which explains why we haven't had many blog posts as of late. But don't worry, it seems I'm never short on stories.
And thus continues the saga of Rand al'Thor.
Guys, Rand is a dear boy and a wonderful friend. But the longer this story goes and the more I get to know him, the more I realize that I do not want to be in a relationship with him. But alas, we went on a not-date this past weekend.
What is a not-date, you ask?
Why, it is when you go to see Iron Man 3 with a boy and it's just you two the entire night and spend nearly two hours driving in the car talking and laughing, but you still don't call it a date because you simply didn't go to dinner before hand with your roommate and her boyfriend. Confused? Yeah, so was I.
Rand and I are still really good friends and hang out sometimes, so when he got free tickets to see Iron Man 3 (great movie, ps), he invited me because he knew I would be ecstatic. The night before the movie, he mentioned that his roommate and girlfriend were going to dinner before the movie and maybe we would be interested in joining. Without even thinking, I just straight up asked him if this was a date we were going on. It seems like a perfectly reasonable question, but he was so awkward about it. He finally managed to ask me if I wanted it to be a date (this is a valid question as well, given our history), and I was very casual in my response that "Sure, I don't really care. I'm fine if it's a date." Somehow he understood that as an absolute NO, so he told me he'd just pick me up right before the movie started.
I don't understand why he had to make it so dramatic... we can just go on a date as friends. We didn't even have to make it a date either, we could have just gone and grabbed some food and I'd pay for myself and everything, but he was just determined to not let this be interpreted as a date.
But it was, it was a date in everything but the name.
I don't think this weirdness with Rand will end until he leaves for grad school in August. I guess I've been handling it for months, so I can just keep going for a few more and it will be fine. Or something.
On a positive note: I moved to a new house a week ago. It would appear there are some very eligible, attractive young men in the vicinity. Big fan.
Monday, April 22, 2013
Lalala!
The following post is a continuation of my story with Twitch, beginning where I left off last: a very successful first date.
So after the first date, things just kinda happened. I danced, I smiled, I snuck cheesecake into a movie theater with him - the usual. A few days later, we spent the whole of Saturday together and went on a group date that night. (I hate to admit it, but we were "that couple." We ignored everyone else and were off flirting in our own little world. Oops.) When he dropped me off at the end of the night, we sat down in my family room for a bit and... he grabbed me hand!!
Maybe I had built it up too much by this point, but oddly this didn't really phase me. I was more like, "Oh, of course we'll hold hands right now." Calm and collected people. Calm and collected.
At least while he was there.
From this moment on, Twitch suddenly went into boyfriend mode. We had been hanging out everyday and I had been dying [literally] to know if we would actually date, and now all the sudden he was throwing hugs and hand holds and cuddling into the equation. It was not very gradual and slightly terrifying! Needless to say, two days later he kissed me.
Lalala!
That was 6 weeks ago from today and Twitch and I have been successfully dating (not sure what that constitutes?) ever since! True, there have been many stories of his adorable cuteness/wonderfulness that I could continue to tell, but that's not really what this blog is for. I'm already breaking the rules with so much cheesy success. You may have even stopped reading two blog-posts ago.
So, in conclusion of my four part Twitch-post, I officially declare myself "off the market". I have somehow snagged the much-coveted Twitch and my One Timer days of endless first dates have come to a close.. at least for now.
The One Timer: OVER and out.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Fallin' for Smalls
Well folks, it's been a while since I last wrote, and A LOT has happened since February.
I'M ENGAGED!!!
Just kidding. I'm not that crazy. I also pride myself in not behaving like the typical dating Zoobie who gets engaged after 2 hours of knowing someone. However, I do have many stories to divulge, mostly involving me and the sweetest boy I've ever met. For a preface on Smalls, please see this post.
Last time I wrote, I was about to go on my first date with Smalls. At this point, we were good friends and I was interested in Smalls, but still unsure if I could like him much more than a friend. For our first date, we volunteered at a Best Buddies carnival/talent show. Smalls didn't know it, but I actually have spent hundreds of hours volunteering with special needs groups over the past few years. Needless to say, I thought it was an awesome date. We won some goldfish which we thought would die in a matter of days, especially after we left them in the backseat of a car in 5 degree weather (turns out goldfish come back to life after being frozen, who knew?) Much to our chagrin, after two months they are still kickin'. Smalls keeps plotting ways for them to die, but instead he just buys them more fish food. But this has absolutely no relevance to the story. Sorry, random goldfish tangent is officially over.
After the talent show we went to a delicious crepe restaurant and then watched a movie. It took him a good hour or so, but Smalls finally put his arm around me for the last bit of the movie (he's kind of a chicken when it comes to girls, well maybe just me actually). After this date, I still wasn't head over heels for Smalls, but I could see some definite potential.
The week after that, we spent every day together and there was much hand holding, cuddling, and happiness.
DISCLAIMER: I sincerely apologize if this post is getting too cheesy for you. If you'd like to revisit my unsuccessful dating stories from the past to avoid said cheese, please do so now. This post is only going to get cheesier, so brace yourself.
About a week after our first date, Smalls asked me out again. He picked me up with a box of crayons and a homemade picture book in hand. He informed me that we would be going on a "Choose Your Own Adventure Date." Following this theme, the book was labeled, "The Date, a Choose Your Own Adventure Picture Book by The Cautious Charmer and Smalls." Each page had a caption at the bottom telling what we would be doing at each part of the date, ie dinner, activity, dessert, etc. For each category, several adjectives were listed such as, foreign, oceanic, ancient, etc. I then had to pick a word to describe the activity and then we would go wherever that was. When we got to the restaurant or activity we would color a picture of what we were doing. Isn't Smalls so creative? 10 points to Gryffindor for creativity and adorableness.
So here's how the date went. We went to a Thai restaurant for dinner and then to Cabella's where we dressed up in camo clothes and looked at the fish aquarium. (why there is a fish theme to our relationship, I have no idea). That night I had so much fun with Smalls and felt completely comfortable talking with him for hours. Our picture book looked like it had been colored in by kindergartners, but I guess it's fitting because we were acting like kindergartners, coloring with crayons in the middle of a store. Dating Rule #38: Never take yourself too seriously, especially on dates. Your date will be one million times more fun and 50,000 times less awkward.
After Cabella's, there were a few blank pages left in the book, so we decided to be spontaneous and went to Thanksgiving point to see if there was anything fun to do. Lo and behold, we happened upon a tween tap dancing competition. We thought it was kind of hilarious, so we sat in the back and colored a picture of it.
Sidenote- If this were a parenting blog, I would say this about tween tap dance competitions: Rule #48 of parenting- Never force your child to tap dance in sparkly, neon spandex while you cheer from the crowd like Honey Boo Boo's mom.
After about ten minutes, we gladly left the dancing pubescents and walked around the gardens holding hands until we happened upon a bridge. We talked and laughed for a while, and then he kissed me! I would say it was the most magical moment I've ever experienced and that a million imaginary fireworks erupted over our heads, but it was actually pretty dang awkward. Mostly because I'd never been kissed before and had no idea what to do. As a result, I didn't really do much of anything. Afterward, I'm pretty sure I developed a case of temporary logorrhea. I blubbered something about how I'd never been kissed before and who knows what else. It was one of those moments when you really don't understand why words are spewing out of your mouth, but you have absolutely no control over stopping them. Yes, ladies and gents, I was a complete goofus, but apparently Smalls likes goofuses, because he kissed me again. Then we spent the next hour or so kissing and dancing to Brad Paisley and it was wonderful. By the end of the night I was completely giddy over this boy. I had no doubt that I was falling for Smalls.
And that concludes the first installment of the Smalls series.
Stay tuned-more cheese is coming your way.
-The Cautious Charmer
I'M ENGAGED!!!
Just kidding. I'm not that crazy. I also pride myself in not behaving like the typical dating Zoobie who gets engaged after 2 hours of knowing someone. However, I do have many stories to divulge, mostly involving me and the sweetest boy I've ever met. For a preface on Smalls, please see this post.
Last time I wrote, I was about to go on my first date with Smalls. At this point, we were good friends and I was interested in Smalls, but still unsure if I could like him much more than a friend. For our first date, we volunteered at a Best Buddies carnival/talent show. Smalls didn't know it, but I actually have spent hundreds of hours volunteering with special needs groups over the past few years. Needless to say, I thought it was an awesome date. We won some goldfish which we thought would die in a matter of days, especially after we left them in the backseat of a car in 5 degree weather (turns out goldfish come back to life after being frozen, who knew?) Much to our chagrin, after two months they are still kickin'. Smalls keeps plotting ways for them to die, but instead he just buys them more fish food. But this has absolutely no relevance to the story. Sorry, random goldfish tangent is officially over.
After the talent show we went to a delicious crepe restaurant and then watched a movie. It took him a good hour or so, but Smalls finally put his arm around me for the last bit of the movie (he's kind of a chicken when it comes to girls, well maybe just me actually). After this date, I still wasn't head over heels for Smalls, but I could see some definite potential.
The week after that, we spent every day together and there was much hand holding, cuddling, and happiness.
DISCLAIMER: I sincerely apologize if this post is getting too cheesy for you. If you'd like to revisit my unsuccessful dating stories from the past to avoid said cheese, please do so now. This post is only going to get cheesier, so brace yourself.
About a week after our first date, Smalls asked me out again. He picked me up with a box of crayons and a homemade picture book in hand. He informed me that we would be going on a "Choose Your Own Adventure Date." Following this theme, the book was labeled, "The Date, a Choose Your Own Adventure Picture Book by The Cautious Charmer and Smalls." Each page had a caption at the bottom telling what we would be doing at each part of the date, ie dinner, activity, dessert, etc. For each category, several adjectives were listed such as, foreign, oceanic, ancient, etc. I then had to pick a word to describe the activity and then we would go wherever that was. When we got to the restaurant or activity we would color a picture of what we were doing. Isn't Smalls so creative? 10 points to Gryffindor for creativity and adorableness.
So here's how the date went. We went to a Thai restaurant for dinner and then to Cabella's where we dressed up in camo clothes and looked at the fish aquarium. (why there is a fish theme to our relationship, I have no idea). That night I had so much fun with Smalls and felt completely comfortable talking with him for hours. Our picture book looked like it had been colored in by kindergartners, but I guess it's fitting because we were acting like kindergartners, coloring with crayons in the middle of a store. Dating Rule #38: Never take yourself too seriously, especially on dates. Your date will be one million times more fun and 50,000 times less awkward.
After Cabella's, there were a few blank pages left in the book, so we decided to be spontaneous and went to Thanksgiving point to see if there was anything fun to do. Lo and behold, we happened upon a tween tap dancing competition. We thought it was kind of hilarious, so we sat in the back and colored a picture of it.
Sidenote- If this were a parenting blog, I would say this about tween tap dance competitions: Rule #48 of parenting- Never force your child to tap dance in sparkly, neon spandex while you cheer from the crowd like Honey Boo Boo's mom.
After about ten minutes, we gladly left the dancing pubescents and walked around the gardens holding hands until we happened upon a bridge. We talked and laughed for a while, and then he kissed me! I would say it was the most magical moment I've ever experienced and that a million imaginary fireworks erupted over our heads, but it was actually pretty dang awkward. Mostly because I'd never been kissed before and had no idea what to do. As a result, I didn't really do much of anything. Afterward, I'm pretty sure I developed a case of temporary logorrhea. I blubbered something about how I'd never been kissed before and who knows what else. It was one of those moments when you really don't understand why words are spewing out of your mouth, but you have absolutely no control over stopping them. Yes, ladies and gents, I was a complete goofus, but apparently Smalls likes goofuses, because he kissed me again. Then we spent the next hour or so kissing and dancing to Brad Paisley and it was wonderful. By the end of the night I was completely giddy over this boy. I had no doubt that I was falling for Smalls.
And that concludes the first installment of the Smalls series.
Stay tuned-more cheese is coming your way.
-The Cautious Charmer
Have some cake with that CHEESE.
Well folks, it's been a while since I last wrote, and A LOT has happened since February.
I'M ENGAGED!!!
Just kidding. I'm not that crazy. I also pride myself in not behaving like the typical dating Zoobie who gets engaged after 2 hours of knowing someone. However, I do have many stories to divulge, mostly involving me and the sweetest boy I've ever met. For a preface on Smalls, please see this post.
Last time I wrote, I was about to go on my first date with Smalls. At this point, we were good friends and I was interested in Smalls, but still unsure if I could like him much more than a friend. For our first date, we volunteered at a Best Buddies carnival/talent show. Smalls didn't know it, but I actually have spent hundreds of hours volunteering with special needs groups over the past few years. Needless to say, I thought it was an awesome date. We won some goldfish which we thought would die in a matter of days, especially after we left them in the backseat of a car in 5 degree weather (turns out goldfish come back to life after being frozen, who knew?) Much to our chagrin, after two months they are still kickin'. Smalls keeps plotting ways for them to die, but instead he just buys them more fish food. But this has absolutely no relevance to the story. Sorry, random goldfish tangent is officially over.
After the talent show we went to a delicious crepe restaurant and then watched a movie. It took him a good hour or so, but Smalls finally put his arm around me for the last bit of the movie (he's kind of a chicken when it comes to girls, well maybe just me actually). After this date, I still wasn't head over heels for Smalls, but I could see some definite potential.
The week after that, we spent every day together and there was much hand holding, cuddling, and happiness.
DISCLAIMER: I sincerely apologize if this post is getting too cheesy for you. If you'd like to revisit my unsuccessful dating stories from the past to avoid said cheese, please do so now. This post is only going to get cheesier, so brace yourself.
About a week after our first date, Smalls asked me out again. He picked me up with a box of crayons and a homemade picture book in hand. He informed me that we would be going on a "Choose Your Own Adventure Date." Following this theme, the book was labeled, "The Date, a Choose Your Own Adventure Picture Book by The Cautious Charmer and Smalls." Each page had a caption at the bottom telling what we would be doing at each part of the date, ie dinner, activity, dessert, etc. For each category, several adjectives were listed such as, foreign, oceanic, ancient, etc. I then had to pick a word to describe the activity and then we would go wherever that was. When we got to the restaurant or activity we would color a picture of what we were doing. Isn't Smalls so creative? 10 points to Gryffindor for creativity and adorableness.
So here's how the date went. We went to a Thai restaurant for dinner and then to Cabella's where we dressed up in camo clothes and looked at the fish aquarium. (why there is a fish theme to our relationship, I have no idea). That night I had so much fun with Smalls and felt completely comfortable talking with him for hours. Our picture book looked like it had been colored in by kindergartners, but I guess it's fitting because we were acting like kindergartners, coloring with crayons in the middle of a store. Dating Rule #38: Never take yourself too seriously, especially on dates. Your date will be one million times more fun and 50,000 times less awkward.
After Cabella's, there were a few blank pages left in the book, so we decided to be spontaneous and went to Thanksgiving point to see if there was anything fun to do. Lo and behold, we happened upon a tween tap dancing competition. We thought it was kind of hilarious, so we sat in the back and colored a picture of it.
Sidenote- If this were a parenting blog, I would say this about tween tap dance competitions: Rule #48 of parenting- Never force your child to tap dance in sparkly, neon spandex while you cheer from the crowd like Honey Boo Boo's mom.
After about ten minutes, we gladly left the dancing pubescents and walked around the gardens holding hands until we happened upon a bridge. We talked and laughed for a while, and then he kissed me! I would say it was the most magical moment I've ever experienced and that a million imaginary fireworks erupted over our heads, but it was actually pretty dang awkward. Mostly because I'd never been kissed before and had no idea what to do. As a result, I didn't really do much of anything. Afterward, I'm pretty sure I developed a case of temporary logorrhea. I blubbered something about how I'd never been kissed before and who knows what else. It was one of those moments when you really don't understand why words are spewing out of your mouth, but you have absolutely no control over stopping them. Yes, ladies and gents, I was a complete goofus, but apparently Smalls likes goofuses, because he kissed me again. Then we spent the next hour or so kissing and dancing to Brad Paisley and it was wonderful. By the end of the night I was completely giddy over this boy. I had no doubt that I was falling for Smalls.
And that concludes the first installment of the Smalls series.
Stay tuned-more cheese is coming your way.
-The Cautious Charmer
I'M ENGAGED!!!
Just kidding. I'm not that crazy. I also pride myself in not behaving like the typical dating Zoobie who gets engaged after 2 hours of knowing someone. However, I do have many stories to divulge, mostly involving me and the sweetest boy I've ever met. For a preface on Smalls, please see this post.
Last time I wrote, I was about to go on my first date with Smalls. At this point, we were good friends and I was interested in Smalls, but still unsure if I could like him much more than a friend. For our first date, we volunteered at a Best Buddies carnival/talent show. Smalls didn't know it, but I actually have spent hundreds of hours volunteering with special needs groups over the past few years. Needless to say, I thought it was an awesome date. We won some goldfish which we thought would die in a matter of days, especially after we left them in the backseat of a car in 5 degree weather (turns out goldfish come back to life after being frozen, who knew?) Much to our chagrin, after two months they are still kickin'. Smalls keeps plotting ways for them to die, but instead he just buys them more fish food. But this has absolutely no relevance to the story. Sorry, random goldfish tangent is officially over.
After the talent show we went to a delicious crepe restaurant and then watched a movie. It took him a good hour or so, but Smalls finally put his arm around me for the last bit of the movie (he's kind of a chicken when it comes to girls, well maybe just me actually). After this date, I still wasn't head over heels for Smalls, but I could see some definite potential.
The week after that, we spent every day together and there was much hand holding, cuddling, and happiness.
DISCLAIMER: I sincerely apologize if this post is getting too cheesy for you. If you'd like to revisit my unsuccessful dating stories from the past to avoid said cheese, please do so now. This post is only going to get cheesier, so brace yourself.
About a week after our first date, Smalls asked me out again. He picked me up with a box of crayons and a homemade picture book in hand. He informed me that we would be going on a "Choose Your Own Adventure Date." Following this theme, the book was labeled, "The Date, a Choose Your Own Adventure Picture Book by The Cautious Charmer and Smalls." Each page had a caption at the bottom telling what we would be doing at each part of the date, ie dinner, activity, dessert, etc. For each category, several adjectives were listed such as, foreign, oceanic, ancient, etc. I then had to pick a word to describe the activity and then we would go wherever that was. When we got to the restaurant or activity we would color a picture of what we were doing. Isn't Smalls so creative? 10 points to Gryffindor for creativity and adorableness.
So here's how the date went. We went to a Thai restaurant for dinner and then to Cabella's where we dressed up in camo clothes and looked at the fish aquarium. (why there is a fish theme to our relationship, I have no idea). That night I had so much fun with Smalls and felt completely comfortable talking with him for hours. Our picture book looked like it had been colored in by kindergartners, but I guess it's fitting because we were acting like kindergartners, coloring with crayons in the middle of a store. Dating Rule #38: Never take yourself too seriously, especially on dates. Your date will be one million times more fun and 50,000 times less awkward.
After Cabella's, there were a few blank pages left in the book, so we decided to be spontaneous and went to Thanksgiving point to see if there was anything fun to do. Lo and behold, we happened upon a tween tap dancing competition. We thought it was kind of hilarious, so we sat in the back and colored a picture of it.
Sidenote- If this were a parenting blog, I would say this about tween tap dance competitions: Rule #48 of parenting- Never force your child to tap dance in sparkly, neon spandex while you cheer from the crowd like Honey Boo Boo's mom.
After about ten minutes, we gladly left the dancing pubescents and walked around the gardens holding hands until we happened upon a bridge. We talked and laughed for a while, and then he kissed me! I would say it was the most magical moment I've ever experienced and that a million imaginary fireworks erupted over our heads, but it was actually pretty dang awkward. Mostly because I'd never been kissed before and had no idea what to do. As a result, I didn't really do much of anything. Afterward, I'm pretty sure I developed a case of temporary logorrhea. I blubbered something about how I'd never been kissed before and who knows what else. It was one of those moments when you really don't understand why words are spewing out of your mouth, but you have absolutely no control over stopping them. Yes, ladies and gents, I was a complete goofus, but apparently Smalls likes goofuses, because he kissed me again. Then we spent the next hour or so kissing and dancing to Brad Paisley and it was wonderful. By the end of the night I was completely giddy over this boy. I had no doubt that I was falling for Smalls.
And that concludes the first installment of the Smalls series.
Stay tuned-more cheese is coming your way.
-The Cautious Charmer
Friday, April 5, 2013
He's a hard egg to crack.
Hello all! Spring has sprung! But alas, we're in Utah, so chances are it's going to snow again next week.
But let's enjoy the beauty that is the outdoors while it lasts! This is definitely what I've been doing; just enjoying and trying not to worry about anything. You know, those usual things that I worry about: boys and school. While I'm trying not to be stressed or think about it too much, I do still want to recap what has occurred between myself and Bodhai.
While all of this Rand nonsense has been going on for the last 6 weeks, the Bodhai situation was moving forward and then has kind of paused... Let me explain:
4 days after I went on that date with Rand and he explained himself to me and I told him I didn't want to date him, well then I went on an awesome date with Bodhai.
At one point on this date, we were adventuring on a snowy hill and it was beautiful... and then he kissed me! It definitely wasn't unwelcome, but it was completely unexpected. I was thrilled, but as soon as I got home I realized that I didn't even feel like I knew him and didn't know if I liked him that much yet. But I figured things would start progressing quickly and that we would be dating in no time.
False.
[This seems to be a trend with me: being completely misguided in how things, relationships specifically, will play out.]
Bodhai is great. I like spending time with him. He is really into music. Like REALLY into music. He is super funny and adorable and we have fun together. After spending a few weeks hanging out with him and having fun, I realized that I didn't even know anything about him! He is awesome and talks a lot - but it feels like often he isn't really saying anything. He is just not very open and it's hard to get to the deeper parts of his personality. He is just one hard egg to crack. I've realized that this is how I am some times too. I've actually realized that in general we are super similar in our personalities, which is why we get along so well. But we do not really have similar interests. So we can talk and talk and talk forever, but when we try to share the things we are really passionate about - well, we just don't understand each other. It's so weird.
So basically, the last month we've hung out a few times and the first few times we kissed some more... it was great, but I wasn't really sure how I was feeling about the whole thing. I kind of get the feeling that we both are interested in each other, but not super invested in it. So neither of us really makes too much of an effort to talk or to see each other, though we love it when we do see each other. Who knows what is going to happen with this one... at this point, I would like to see if we could date, but I'm fine if it doesn't work out.
Yes, I know...
I'm the Friendly Kisser.
Friday, March 29, 2013
"I have not the pleasure of understanding you"
So I went on that date with Rand. It was so fun, which made it harder.
Don't you just hate when there's a boy who is wonderful and funny, but you know a relationship between the two of you just wouldn't work out? Yeah, that's how it is with Rand. And it's awful.
I was sick of the drama and the confusion and of feeling like I was second best, and I wasn't letting this date end without demanding an explanation from him. We had a really great conversation and he completely explained why he was acting the way that he was and why he had changed his mind about me multiple times in the matter of a week... he was just so confused about what he was thinking and feeling, plus the whole thing with The One Timer had kind of gotten blown out of proportion due to the fact that all of our friends are in each others lives. Basically, I wasn't angry anymore at all - I just felt so sad for Rand because of his confusion and frustration and lack of confidence.
And I learned Dating Rule #96: People generally have good intentions; give them the opportunity to explain themselves before jumping to hasty conclusions.
In the end he said that he wasn't ready for a relationship, but he wanted to keep going on dates and spending time together... I thought about it for a second, but there was no way I could agree to that. I was still hurt and confused by what had gone down and I didn't think I could handle going on dates with him right now. So we left that date deciding just to be friends. I knew it was going to be kind of hard at first, but I figured that he would eventually realize as I had that a relationship wouldn't work out between us.
Yeah, fail.
It's been a month since that time and Rand is still hanging around but we've never further discussed what's going on between us. I see him multiple times a week because two of his best friends are currently dating two of my roommates, so he is just always there. I have a hard time figuring out what's happening between us. And I'm pretty sure he is still interested in me. But I don't want anything to happen between us. That boy is so dramatic and kind of immature and I don't think I can handle it. Yet, I still find him fascinating and wonderful and am still sometimes attracted to him. I seriously love him to death, but not in a romantic way... but I don't think he would agree. He started the flirting again a week or two ago. I am just a naturally flirty person, so whenever he is around, I have to take special precautions not to lead him on and and flirt with him. Somedays I am much better at this than others.
Basically, he is still obviously interested in me and I am definitely not interested in him any longer, and now I don't know what to do. He is wonderful and in some ways I still do like him, but there are just somethings about him that drive me crazy and we would never work out. I felt so bad about it at first because I know he's still interested, but it's been so long and he is still just hanging on, even though I haven't given him any reason to, so it's to the point that sometimes I just feel indifferent about it.
Don't think I'm heartless - though you probably wouldn't be the first to think that.
But why won't he just get the hint and stop trying to make something happen with us and just accept that all we're ever going to be is friends.
He stresses me out. And I feel bad when he hears about or sees me with Bodhai (the story which I will recap next time). I don't want to hurt him, but I also don't want to date him...
Oh my life. And oh that boy. He has created so much stress/drama in my life.
Friendly Kisser. Peacing out.
Don't you just hate when there's a boy who is wonderful and funny, but you know a relationship between the two of you just wouldn't work out? Yeah, that's how it is with Rand. And it's awful.
I was sick of the drama and the confusion and of feeling like I was second best, and I wasn't letting this date end without demanding an explanation from him. We had a really great conversation and he completely explained why he was acting the way that he was and why he had changed his mind about me multiple times in the matter of a week... he was just so confused about what he was thinking and feeling, plus the whole thing with The One Timer had kind of gotten blown out of proportion due to the fact that all of our friends are in each others lives. Basically, I wasn't angry anymore at all - I just felt so sad for Rand because of his confusion and frustration and lack of confidence.
And I learned Dating Rule #96: People generally have good intentions; give them the opportunity to explain themselves before jumping to hasty conclusions.
In the end he said that he wasn't ready for a relationship, but he wanted to keep going on dates and spending time together... I thought about it for a second, but there was no way I could agree to that. I was still hurt and confused by what had gone down and I didn't think I could handle going on dates with him right now. So we left that date deciding just to be friends. I knew it was going to be kind of hard at first, but I figured that he would eventually realize as I had that a relationship wouldn't work out between us.
Yeah, fail.
It's been a month since that time and Rand is still hanging around but we've never further discussed what's going on between us. I see him multiple times a week because two of his best friends are currently dating two of my roommates, so he is just always there. I have a hard time figuring out what's happening between us. And I'm pretty sure he is still interested in me. But I don't want anything to happen between us. That boy is so dramatic and kind of immature and I don't think I can handle it. Yet, I still find him fascinating and wonderful and am still sometimes attracted to him. I seriously love him to death, but not in a romantic way... but I don't think he would agree. He started the flirting again a week or two ago. I am just a naturally flirty person, so whenever he is around, I have to take special precautions not to lead him on and and flirt with him. Somedays I am much better at this than others.
Basically, he is still obviously interested in me and I am definitely not interested in him any longer, and now I don't know what to do. He is wonderful and in some ways I still do like him, but there are just somethings about him that drive me crazy and we would never work out. I felt so bad about it at first because I know he's still interested, but it's been so long and he is still just hanging on, even though I haven't given him any reason to, so it's to the point that sometimes I just feel indifferent about it.
Don't think I'm heartless - though you probably wouldn't be the first to think that.
But why won't he just get the hint and stop trying to make something happen with us and just accept that all we're ever going to be is friends.
He stresses me out. And I feel bad when he hears about or sees me with Bodhai (the story which I will recap next time). I don't want to hurt him, but I also don't want to date him...
Oh my life. And oh that boy. He has created so much stress/drama in my life.
Friendly Kisser. Peacing out.
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Monday, March 25, 2013
Roller coaster much?
Oh my life. Folks, it's been crazy.
The One Timer briefly recapped the California road trip that we went on and it was so fun! I was hesitant to go on the trip because I had been wanting to spend time with Bodhai and he had asked me on the date for that weekend, but alas I ended up road tripping with Rand instead. And it was a blast!
Guys, I'm going to keep this story as short as possible and in order to do that, I must just preface some things that I have learned about Rand al'Thor: he is the most perfectly confused boy with a bit of a lack of self-confidence, which is why he hangs on to things and has a problem letting go. That should explain a lot of the proceedings of the last couple of weeks.
We got back from California - that very night he came over to talk and tell me that he feels like he needs to be completely honest and he doesn't want to lead me on. Something just wouldn't let him like me, and he didn't think this was going anywhere. I was thrilled!! It made my decision for me, and I no longer had to stress about the situation with Rand, we could just be friends... or so I thought.
But then, the very next day Rand expressed interest in The One Timer.
Yeah.
What?!
And so for a week The One Timer was in a lovely love triangle with Rand and Twitch (which I am positive she will give you some excellent details on in a later post), and I was blissfully unaware of the whole situation. When I was finally let into the loop, I barely had enough time to register the ridiculousness of the situation and realize that I was kind of hurt that he dropped me like a hot tamale and turned so quickly to my roommate.
Before I even had time to completely understand what was going down and less than a week from the day that he told me that nothing was going to happen between us, he called me and asked me on a date! WHAT THE HECK IS HAPPENING IN THIS BOYS MIND? What makes him think this is okay? It totally made me feel like he realized he didn't have a chance with The One Timer, so he figured he might as well just take me on a date. But I refuse to be someone's second choice!
My direct quote when he asked me on this date: "What the freak Rand?! You are killing me!"
He told me that he knows that he put me through an emotional roller coaster through that week and it would be perfectly fair if I said no, but he really would like to take me on a date. I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and agreed to go on the date. I think a lot of my motivation was because I was planning on grilling him with questions, making him completely explain what was going on.
And THEN while all of this drama was occurring with Rand, I was spending time with Bodhai. We went on a date that I swear was tailored just for me: nicklecade, frozen yogurt, Harry Potter movie, and cuddling. I was really starting to like this boy, but once this whole Rand thing happened, it made me confused about Bodhai as well.
There you have it. That was my situation about a month ago. Further updates to follow.
The Friendly Kisser
The One Timer briefly recapped the California road trip that we went on and it was so fun! I was hesitant to go on the trip because I had been wanting to spend time with Bodhai and he had asked me on the date for that weekend, but alas I ended up road tripping with Rand instead. And it was a blast!
Guys, I'm going to keep this story as short as possible and in order to do that, I must just preface some things that I have learned about Rand al'Thor: he is the most perfectly confused boy with a bit of a lack of self-confidence, which is why he hangs on to things and has a problem letting go. That should explain a lot of the proceedings of the last couple of weeks.
We got back from California - that very night he came over to talk and tell me that he feels like he needs to be completely honest and he doesn't want to lead me on. Something just wouldn't let him like me, and he didn't think this was going anywhere. I was thrilled!! It made my decision for me, and I no longer had to stress about the situation with Rand, we could just be friends... or so I thought.
But then, the very next day Rand expressed interest in The One Timer.
Yeah.
What?!
And so for a week The One Timer was in a lovely love triangle with Rand and Twitch (which I am positive she will give you some excellent details on in a later post), and I was blissfully unaware of the whole situation. When I was finally let into the loop, I barely had enough time to register the ridiculousness of the situation and realize that I was kind of hurt that he dropped me like a hot tamale and turned so quickly to my roommate.
Before I even had time to completely understand what was going down and less than a week from the day that he told me that nothing was going to happen between us, he called me and asked me on a date! WHAT THE HECK IS HAPPENING IN THIS BOYS MIND? What makes him think this is okay? It totally made me feel like he realized he didn't have a chance with The One Timer, so he figured he might as well just take me on a date. But I refuse to be someone's second choice!
My direct quote when he asked me on this date: "What the freak Rand?! You are killing me!"
He told me that he knows that he put me through an emotional roller coaster through that week and it would be perfectly fair if I said no, but he really would like to take me on a date. I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and agreed to go on the date. I think a lot of my motivation was because I was planning on grilling him with questions, making him completely explain what was going on.
And THEN while all of this drama was occurring with Rand, I was spending time with Bodhai. We went on a date that I swear was tailored just for me: nicklecade, frozen yogurt, Harry Potter movie, and cuddling. I was really starting to like this boy, but once this whole Rand thing happened, it made me confused about Bodhai as well.
There you have it. That was my situation about a month ago. Further updates to follow.
The Friendly Kisser
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Itch for Twitch
The Friendly Kisser and I planned a trip to California. Naturally, we wanted to bring men. Because of that, we invited Rand A'Thor and Twitch. Naturally, both were extremely fun and attractive. While The Friendly Kisser had interest in Rand A'Thor (They'd previously been out on a few dates, etc), I had mild interest in Twitch. And I really do mean mild! He was in our ward, but I hadn't talked to him a ton.
Everytime I had though had been wonderful. In fact, I do believe I announced to my roommates before leaving for Cali - "I want Twitch to ask me on a date!" But who knows.. It's very likely I just yelled that myself.
Imagine 3 days of bliss and fun. We went to the beach for 7 hours on Saturday, enjoying 80 degree weather, went out to eat, watched movies, played games and told stories. Not just any stories, though. Dating stories. After 20 hours in the car, the 4 of us had each shared the rough entirety of our dating histories.
What did I learn from this?
Twitch was clearly a ladies man. Not only did his stories suggest it, but Rand made sure to make it clear. "Every girl" wanted to date this man and this man seemed to be rather picky. As Rand pointed out, by the end of the trip, I had become "one of the many" girls. Twitch was fun and willing to be crazy slash do embarrassing things. He was easy to talk to. He was sweet and yet hilarious. He was a blast to be around. No, I couldn't find anything wrong with him. And that's where the problems REALLY began.
Upon returning from Cali, I had definitely made up my mind. However, I just needed to convince him of the same thing: we needed to date. But how do you convince a man who can have any lady he wants that you're good enough to date?
That, my friends, is where the story really gets good.
To be continued...
The One Timer: Over and Out.
Everytime I had though had been wonderful. In fact, I do believe I announced to my roommates before leaving for Cali - "I want Twitch to ask me on a date!" But who knows.. It's very likely I just yelled that myself.
Imagine 3 days of bliss and fun. We went to the beach for 7 hours on Saturday, enjoying 80 degree weather, went out to eat, watched movies, played games and told stories. Not just any stories, though. Dating stories. After 20 hours in the car, the 4 of us had each shared the rough entirety of our dating histories.
What did I learn from this?
Twitch was clearly a ladies man. Not only did his stories suggest it, but Rand made sure to make it clear. "Every girl" wanted to date this man and this man seemed to be rather picky. As Rand pointed out, by the end of the trip, I had become "one of the many" girls. Twitch was fun and willing to be crazy slash do embarrassing things. He was easy to talk to. He was sweet and yet hilarious. He was a blast to be around. No, I couldn't find anything wrong with him. And that's where the problems REALLY began.
Upon returning from Cali, I had definitely made up my mind. However, I just needed to convince him of the same thing: we needed to date. But how do you convince a man who can have any lady he wants that you're good enough to date?
That, my friends, is where the story really gets good.
To be continued...
The One Timer: Over and Out.
Friday, February 22, 2013
Don't Be a Goofus!
I have a crush on a boy named Smalls.
(Not to be confused with Squints. Unlike the Friendly Kisser, I prefer not to kiss minors.)
He really is a grown-up Smalls. He's sooo nice, a little dorky, short, and has a pretty serious obsession with baseball. Oh and did I mention his favorite movie is The Sandlot? Fortunately, he doesn't wear hats with 6 inch brims, but you get the picture.
We met way back in September, but we didn't ever talk to each other until January. You see, he's the roommate of Rand, so he's been coming over a lot more as of late. I didn't think twice about him up until a few weeks ago, but then one day we bonded over our love of baseball and hatred of the Yankees, and suddenly we've become great friends. Over the past week and a half he's texted me every day, invited me to do things with him, and done all the other usual "I'm interested in you" type things. Let me just say that he is the sweetest guy on the face of the planet. I've never met a more thoughtful guy than Smalls. Even though we haven't been on a date yet, he always opens my doors and does all the other little chivalrous things a girl could hope for.
Now, I'm still a little unsure about my feelings for Smalls. I have some reservations about him still. Mostly I'm just not sure if he's too nice, and I'm not sure if I could handle dating someone who's my height or shorter than me. But I'm excited to get to know him more! Even if nothing happens, we'll be good friends and I'm fine with that. I'm going on a date with him tonight, so I'll try as hard as I can to not be a goofus, and we'll just have to see what happens after that!
That's all for now.
-The Cautious Charmer
Thursday, February 14, 2013
It's raining men! Hallelujah?
Oh hey, it's Valentine's Day. Good luck with your love folks, I know I'll need it.
I know this has been mentioned before, but it's so true:
when it rains, it freaking pours.
You may not have noticed, but my boy life has been really quite dull over the last few months. I obviously had some stories last semester, but overall, nothing significant has occurred in my dating life in 6 months. But now all of the sudden, in just the last two weeks I'm getting flooded out.
Rand al'Thor is still just hanging around and trying to make me love him and I'm still undecided.
Okay, so maybe that's not exactly how it's happening... but pretty much.
I just adore him and his sense of humor and his overall sweetness. There's just something about him that I can't get over, and I honestly can't figure out what it is. Sometimes I think it's because he's super awkward, and sometimes I think it's because he's kind of negative, and sometimes I think I'm just completely making up excuses. He comes over to my apartment every night and I completely enjoy it, but I just don't know if I actually feel for him the way that he wants me to.
Then there's Bodhai. He is obsessed with rap and I love that; he in no way a gangster, though I think he sometimes thinks he is. A very good friend of mine introduced me to Bodhai two weeks ago and set us up on a date last weekend. It was wonderful and so was he. I still don't know him super well, but I definitely want to. One problem: he doesn't like sports [yes, I have similar concerns as Miss Inconsistent]. But I have to keep reminding myself that I can't immediately discount him because of that. I have enjoyed every second that I have spent with him thus far, so we will see what happens.
And then there's Mr. Director. Where the heck did he come from? He's been in my ward for months and a week and a half ago he couldn't even remember my name. Then he super randomly asked me on a date for last weekend. It was fun and had good conversation, but I could never like him. After that date I thought we would just be good friends, but I guess Mr. Director has other plans. He has contacted me every day since and made an effort to come visit me each day as well, but I've been busy and his plans have been constantly thwarted. I feel bad and I do want to give him a legitimate chance, but between school, work, and figuring out what's happening with both Rand and Bodhai - I just don't have time!
The Friendly Kisser
Friday, February 8, 2013
Strange Attraction
It was a normal Saturday afternoon. I was spending time staring at my computer, thinking about how much of my essay I would have finished had I started on it earlier that morning. I was too far-gone, though, as thoughts of my roommate’s recital that night flashed through my mind. I knew she was going to kill it, and the best part was that Juan was going to be there to witness it with me.
In case you didn’t notice, I really suck at coming up with codenames.
You see, Juan is the new boy that I’ve kinda been interested in lately. The best way I know how to describe my interest is that I’m strangely attracted to him. Yes, strangely. He is nothing like anyone I have ever liked in the past, especially when you compare him to the boy that I was finally able to get over after a year.
Don’t worry; I’ll get to him later.
While this boy, Juan, has all of the core attributes that I adore, including a killer sense of humor and awesome taste in music, he also has a lot of, let’s say, unique attributes. His favorite form of literature is a comic book, he has a plethora of cat shirts, he has a gnarly mustache, and he hates sports.
Yeah, he hates sports. Try to wrap your head around that one. This is the part where you ask me why I’m still attracted to him. I HAVE NO FETCHING IDEA.
To further the conundrum, I must also shed some light on my No Weenies policy. You see, if I meet a guy and feel like I can:
A) Beat him in an arm-wrestle,
B) Throw a football further than him, or
C) Do both at the same time,
Then we probably have a problem. I really don’t like the idea of me being the physically stronger person in a relationship. Some girls are all for that, but it just won’t work for me. I have an irrational fear of my husband one day coming to me and being like, “Hey honey, I can’t unscrew the lid to this jar. Will you do it for me?” And I’ll be like, “Yeah, let me take a break from lifting all these weights and use my masculine undertones to manhandle that for ya.”
Eww.
Anyway, this kid Juan is bordering on violating my No Weenies policy, but there’s something about him that fascinates me. He makes me laugh all the time, he’s super laid back and doesn’t take himself so seriously, and he knows what he wants to do in life. To me, that’s attractive. Everything else makes it, well, strangely attractive.
Now that my description of Juan is out of the way, I can get back to the story. So, I was waiting around my apartment semi-patiently for the night’s festivities when I got a call from a kid in my ward named Diddy. He asked me on a last-minute date, but I told him my situation with the recital and instead invited him to come to that. So, as expected, he did. What I wasn’t expecting, however, was for him to awkwardly follow me around for the remainder of the evening. It’s like he wasn’t there, but I knew he was there, always in my peripheral.
Don’t get me wrong, Diddy’s a great guy, but it was hard for me to give him the attention that he needed when I just wanted to be with Juan.
Oh, and remember that one guy I said I had finally gotten over? (We’ll call him MJ.) Yeah, don’t worry, but he came to the recital, too. The worst part was that he came alone, so I felt bad just leaving him there to fend for himself.
It was like I was torn between eating three completely different cakes. I knew for sure that I wanted one cake in particular, but I knew that I had to dabble in the other two or else they would somehow feel bad.
Wow. It is very possible that was the worst analogy I’ve ever come up with.
Finally Diddy and MJ made their exits and I was able to focus on just one boy again. Juan and a few of my roommates ended up coming back to my apartment to play games. We had just started when there was a knock at the door. In usual fashion, we yelled “Come In!” at the top of our lungs, curious as to who was there.
My mind wet itself as Brian walked in.
Dude! What the fetch are you doing here?!
Brian is the boy that I was nearly dating fall semester. Things were going great, but then Christmas break happened and things kind of fizzled. Being back to school I had seen him a few times, but nothing else had happened.
Oh, and did I mention that he’s Juan’s roommate? The plot thickens …
So these are the boys that have played significant parts in my life as of late. They're all so different, lending validity to my penname, but I have learned important lessons from each of them. I started with describing Juan because he's the one that is most recent, but I will definitely make sure to get to the others.
Stay tuned!
- Miss Inconsistent
Sunday, February 3, 2013
You Sneaky Sigmund!
As promised, an update on our dear friend Sigmund. Last you heard, he had devastated me with his questions concerning OTHER women. We had made it through Christmas break with the "love" still flowin, only to have him turn on me and pull the "friend" card. Here's the past three weeks in a confusing/infuriating nutshell:
After call #2 of him asking me advice about some other chick, I decided I didn't want to live in confusion and pain. He obviously didn't like me, so I would text him and give him the quick opportunity to let me know so that I could officially move on. (Yes, I'm big on closure things like this. Without them, it takes me about 3 times longer to move on and stop analyzing everything.) However, it didn't end up being the simple closure I had imagined. He ended up coming over to talk. Coming over! That's like.. DTR status right there. We'd been on a mere 2 dates.
We went out to his car and, long story short, he said he was super confused and feeling a wee bit uneasy. UNEASY.. key words for "I don't like you enough," right? So I went inside, had a bawl fest, and moved on. Really, I did quite well after the first initial punch in the face.
2 WEEKS LATER.
Sigmund calls. He wants to catch up and go to lunch on Saturday. WHAT?!? Okay, whatever. He just wants to be friends. This is "fun."
1 WEEK LATER.
Sigmund texts me on a Friday night and wants to come hang out. What, WHAT?!
Interspersed between these two occurances, Sigmund has been flirting and talking to me just like normal. We don't text or call as much, but when I do see him he seems to go out of his way to talk to me, trip me, poke me, or do other random silly flirty things.
Clearly Sigmund is a confused soul. I wanted things to work out with us SO bad, only to have him shut me down with his "uneasy" line. Now, he's crawling back with one of those sneak attack moves!
Or... is he? Cause I clearly don't understand this man. What I DO understand: I was successful enough in moving on a few weeks ago that I'm not sure how I feel about his sneak attacks.
The One Timer: Over and Out
Monday, January 28, 2013
The man decided to wed
So I had something that I was going to write about today, but then this morning I was slapped in the face with a fact that I can't stop thinking about:
Stonewall Jackson is engaged.
Not that this is a super huge shock; I mean, he has been dating this girl since August (even before I poured out my heart to him. Supes awks, I know). But still. I don't know what I'm feeling right now. It's not that I still have feelings for him; oh I am definitely over that. But Stonewall was the first boy that I ever seriously thought that there was any potential of us getting married. Granted it has been nearly a year since any such thought crossed my mind.
"Weird" is the only word I can think to describe how I feel about his engagement.
I keep having the thought that it could have been me getting engaged to him. And that he is yet another amazing boy that I let slip away.
Don't get me wrong, I am 100% positive that calling things off with him was the right choice and we would not have ended up together. I honestly haven't really thought about him since that night in September when I poured my heart out to him, except of course for the few awkward moments when I've run into him on campus. But there's still an annoying part in the back of my mind that can not get over how weird it is that he's engaged. I think it's just weird to know that he's moved on and found someone new to love and marry, while I'm still floundering here. I've moved on, but I have not found my someone. Yet. It's hard to accept that.
The Friendly Kisser
Friday, January 25, 2013
Welp, Here Goes Nothin'!
I’ve never been one to fall in love with love.
I know what you’re thinking. Then why the heck are you contributing to this blog? To be honest, I’m wondering the same thing. In a strange way I have always felt expressing my feelings made me weak, made me feel I wasn’t strong enough to hold it all together on my own. I attribute this to the many times I have witnessed girls crying for hours over relationships that didn’t bloom or work out, leaving them convinced they’d never find love. I perceived it as sad, pathetic even, and swore to myself I would never be one of them.
And then I failed at life. Turns out even I, Miss Inconsistent, am not immune. I inevitably fell in love with a boy (or two) and joined the ranks of lovestruck women for a season.
But I'll save those stories for later.
Despite what I've been through, my experiences in the realm of dating haven’t made me any more eager to express my feelings. So if I’m not willing to share my feelings to the few I trust around me, why would I ever put them on here for the whole world to see?
Stay tuned!
-Miss Inconsistent
Welcome, MISS INCONSISTENT.
Since the heartbreaker has been MIA the past few months and is now leaving on a mission, we are pleased to annouce the newest addition to our "Blog Family": Miss Inconsistent.
We found her on the brink of starvation near an old abandoned mine. Society and dating had been so cruel to her that she had sunk into a deep, dark, confused depression. Being the saints we are, we took her under our wing(s). Months of therapy and countless hours of psychological training later, we finally feel she is ready for society.
Without further ado, we bring you Miss Inconsistent. Another single woman in Provo with new insights and experiences to offer our readers, we hope you love her as much as we do.
Happy Dating!
Love,
The Girls
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Is it FEAR or just NOT THERE?
Remember Mr. Valentine? Yeah, I know. It was a long time ago. Last summer, to be exact.
Flash back: things sort of just fizzled out on my part and I started slightly avoiding him while still trying to be friends.
Get this: He's back. Kinda.
As far as Mr. Valentine goes, I spent all last semester trying to not lead him on. Over summer, I was willing to see if something could work out... but then we didn't see each other for a month and I lost interest. Instead of talking to him, I just kinda acted standoff-ish. I could tell he was super confused.. however, I did the cowardly thing and let it slowly fade away.
Finally, at the end of last semester, I started being myself again. I let myself flirt a little and just have fun and be open with him. We talked about relationships in general and before long talked about our "summer relationship" and its problems. I thought I was home free! We could just be friends and I wouldn't lead him on!
Rule #7: Unless you give the boy closure, he can and will take any opportunity to invite himself back into your love life!
Last week, I learned this the hard way. Okay, not super hard. He didn't try to make-out with me or anything. But still.
I went over to his house to say hello and ended up staying for a few hours. Over the course of the evening, Mr. Valentine proceeded to ask me increasingly awkward questions.
"So.. would you have dated me last summer?"
"So... if you ever liked me again, would you tell me?"
"So... would you like to go on another date with me? I'd really like that."
By the end of the third question, I was squirming to get out of there. I DON'T KNOW!! was the honest answer to all his questions. Here's the thing: he's attractive, he's fun, he's adorably sweet, he thinks I'm the bomb.. Why am I not all over this!?! I DON'T KNOW! Hence my completely vague responses to his questions.
My point is: do I like him and I'm just afraid of his forwardness? Or is it just "not there" for me?
I need answers quick cause Sigmond is making his way back into my mind. (We have a lunch date tomorrow. No worries, there will be another post soon to explain THAT craziness.)
Until then.
The One Timer: Over and Out.
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
But how do you just look past the awkward?
I feel like whenever there is a nice boy, who is hilarious and smart and just overall exactly what I want in a boy... Yes, whenever I meet a boy like that, I create some sort of problem with him in my mind. Some problem that prohibits me from liking him. Whether or not the problem is actually there or just a creation of my imagination, I do not know. But it is always real to me and it keeps me from liking him. This has happened over and over, and I don't know how to get over it.
I'm in this sort of situation right now with a boy named Rand al'Thor. My roommates want me to love him. They say so every time we see him. And I really do want to like him, but I just don't and I don't know why not. He is such a quirky boy, and I LOVE quirky. I love nerdy passions and he is full of them. He loves sports, he is hilarious, he is a brilliant boy, and he is obsessed with fantasy. Yeah, he's just awesome.
And what is the problem I've found with this one? He can be really quite awkward. Sometimes he just sits there and doesn't say anything while he awkwardly smiles, and I feel kind of uncomfortable. He has this hesitant awkward laugh that he does after he says anything and it's super endearing at first, but after a while it puts me on edge.
I've been spending a lot of time with Rand over the last week or so and I just don't know what to think. He's perfectly adorable and I really do think he is SO funny. But I don't know if I can get over his awkward ways. I love spending time with him and I get excited whenever I get a text from him or just thinking about hanging out with him. But when I'm actually there with him, I don't feel it and I fear it's just because I can't look past his awkwardness. What's a girl to do?!
Ok, this post has kind of been all over the place... but welcome to my brain whenever I think about Rand! I just don't know about this one. But I asked him on a date for Saturday, so I suppose we'll just see how that goes.
Friendly Kisser, peacing out.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
I have a legitimate fear.
I have recently developed a legitimate fear of getting married and by so doing, becoming boring. Now, I know you may think this irrational, however the married couple sitting across the table from me right now has me convinced.
Allow me to paint a little picture for you. They are just an average looking couple eating lunch together. It doesn't seem like they are mad or frustrated with each other, but they also haven't smiled once. The girl is staring off into space and the guy is glued to his computer screen. Occasionally, they'll mention something to each other in monotone sentences as they eat their matching lunches of leftover soup from tupperware containers. The most exciting topic I've heard them discuss is the date which will be most convenient for the hubby to shave his head. Now, I know I shouldn't judge or anything, but they just seem soooo bored with each other. Maybe I'm completely wrong, maybe this little lunch break has been the best part of their day, but it sure doesn't seem like it!
Now it's not just this couple that has made this fear become completely real to me. I think we've all had those married friends/relatives who simply fall off the face of the planet, only to be seen every 6 months or so. Some of them, it seems, are under the impression that since they are married, they are now 97 years old and therefore must go to bed promptly at 9:00 pm and only eat things like All Bran and Grape Nuts for breakfast. Okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating. Most couples really aren't like this at all, but what if I'm the outlier who becomes one of these super structured, boring human beings???
These recent fears have led me to wonder why it is that some married couples are so boring. I can see two options here.
A) Marriage makes you boring.
B) Boring married couples were already boring before they got married.
I'd like to believe that the latter is true, because that means that maybe this can all be avoided by following one simple dating rule. #77) Make sure to date someone who makes you passionate, rather than passive, about life. Hopefully, this will help us all avoid becoming thoroughly boring and uninteresting people.
Well, that's all of my ramblings for now.
Until next time,
The Cautious Charmer
Monday, January 14, 2013
You're killing me, Smalls!
Once upon a time, I lived up to my name....
Ok, so maybe I've done that a lot, but this story might beat them all.
A month or so ago I went to a rocking dance party with two of my best friends. We love dancing and going crazy and tearing up the dance floor. We had been dancing for quite a while and it was getting crowded, so we went outside to cool down for a minute.
We were just laughing and enjoying the night sky when these three very tall, relatively attractive guys approached us. They immediately started talking to one of my friends and the conversation quickly escalated to them asking her if she would kiss one of them, let's call him Squints. Now let me preface my friend: she is a complete babe. Tall, blonde, model (literally), super funny... you know, practically perfect. So I don't blame him for wanting to kiss her. She just casually laughed it off, but they were persistent and kept asking, "Well, would you? Would you kiss him?" She finally broke down and said, pointing to me and my other friend, "I'll kiss him if they do!" She was certainly not expecting us to say yes, but she did not want to be the one to say no to them. So the boys turned to us and asked us the same question.
"Would you kiss him? Oh come on. He's on the volleyball team!"
Little did they know that there is a great weakness in my heart for the volleyball team, and though I had never seen him on the volleyball team and didn't entirely believe them, I was sold by the fact that they mentioned volleyball. And so it was agreed and his friends cheered.
So after some coaxing, he kissed the girl he originally wanted to kiss and I think he enjoyed it far too much. And then it was my turn. I walked right on up to him, but then paused...
"Hold on... what's your name?"
"Uh.... Squints."
" Hi! I'm The Friendly Kisser!"
And then I laid one on him! Yeah, it was super awkward but awesome. And then a similarly awkward kiss occurred between he and our other friend. And then before I could even process what had just happened, all three of the boys ran away, never to be seen again.
We all just died laughing and couldn't believe how ridiculous that whole situation was and that we had actually kissed him.
After the initial hilarity, there was much debate over whether or not Squints was actually on the much-coveted Men's Volleyball Team. After some very impressive facebook stalking on all sides, we made many discoveries. Squints was in fact NOT on the volleyball team.
But a few weeks later he announced that he would be joining the volleyball team next year.
And then we discovered, to our absolutely horror, that he is a SENIOR IN HIGH SCHOOL... Yeah, you heard me. Speechless. And hilarious.
So... moral of the story. I am ridiculous. So are my friends. And we kiss teenagers. Not the smartest moment in my life. But definitely one of the best stories.
The Friendly Kisser strikes again.
Ok, so maybe I've done that a lot, but this story might beat them all.
A month or so ago I went to a rocking dance party with two of my best friends. We love dancing and going crazy and tearing up the dance floor. We had been dancing for quite a while and it was getting crowded, so we went outside to cool down for a minute.
We were just laughing and enjoying the night sky when these three very tall, relatively attractive guys approached us. They immediately started talking to one of my friends and the conversation quickly escalated to them asking her if she would kiss one of them, let's call him Squints. Now let me preface my friend: she is a complete babe. Tall, blonde, model (literally), super funny... you know, practically perfect. So I don't blame him for wanting to kiss her. She just casually laughed it off, but they were persistent and kept asking, "Well, would you? Would you kiss him?" She finally broke down and said, pointing to me and my other friend, "I'll kiss him if they do!" She was certainly not expecting us to say yes, but she did not want to be the one to say no to them. So the boys turned to us and asked us the same question.
"Would you kiss him? Oh come on. He's on the volleyball team!"
Little did they know that there is a great weakness in my heart for the volleyball team, and though I had never seen him on the volleyball team and didn't entirely believe them, I was sold by the fact that they mentioned volleyball. And so it was agreed and his friends cheered.
So after some coaxing, he kissed the girl he originally wanted to kiss and I think he enjoyed it far too much. And then it was my turn. I walked right on up to him, but then paused...
"Hold on... what's your name?"
"Uh.... Squints."
" Hi! I'm The Friendly Kisser!"
And then I laid one on him! Yeah, it was super awkward but awesome. And then a similarly awkward kiss occurred between he and our other friend. And then before I could even process what had just happened, all three of the boys ran away, never to be seen again.
We all just died laughing and couldn't believe how ridiculous that whole situation was and that we had actually kissed him.
After the initial hilarity, there was much debate over whether or not Squints was actually on the much-coveted Men's Volleyball Team. After some very impressive facebook stalking on all sides, we made many discoveries. Squints was in fact NOT on the volleyball team.
But a few weeks later he announced that he would be joining the volleyball team next year.
And then we discovered, to our absolutely horror, that he is a SENIOR IN HIGH SCHOOL... Yeah, you heard me. Speechless. And hilarious.
So... moral of the story. I am ridiculous. So are my friends. And we kiss teenagers. Not the smartest moment in my life. But definitely one of the best stories.
The Friendly Kisser strikes again.
Saturday, January 12, 2013
New year, new love?
Oh it's been a while folks! Sorry about that, life can be crazy sometimes.
So we're back in a new semester and trying to get used to new classes and seeing new faces everyday. You know what I love about the beginning of the semester?
The incredibly positive potential for new love.
Old people that you had spent months with and clearly had no interest in have moved out (unless you were creepin and showed too much interest and scared them out), and new people have moved in. You don't know who they're going to be or if one if them is possibly the one for you. The potential is enormous. And then there is the possibilities in all of the new classes. Sadly for me, my major is so small that I have had classes with pretty much the same people for the last year and a half. But you never know! And that is what I love about the beginning if the semester; the uncertainty, the potential, the excitement. Sadly, we're a couple days in and I have nothing of any excitement to report regarding my dating life, but alas, all hope is not lost! Lets see what kind of love this semester holds!
With an air of extra positivity,
The Friendly Kisser
Friday, January 11, 2013
Sigmund FRAUD.
Warning: I am writing this in the heat of the moment. In other words, my emotions are still irrational and dramatic.
Mr. Sigmund has been showing what I thought was a decent amount of interest since break. At least I was happy with things. We talked enough the first week of school... enough that I was further convinced he still had interest and I had a chance.
Wrongo!
Tonight he was driving home from Salt Lake and I texted him a "drive safe please don't slide and die in the snow" text due to the horrid weather. What did he do? He called me. We chatted for 45 minutes. Great news? No. In the conversation he asked me a question.. about another girl. That he was taking out on Saturday. Isn't that like Dating 101? If you are interested in someone, you don't ask them dating advice about other people! My conclusion = I have been completely mistaken about Sigmund.
I'm thoroughly confused, enraged, depressed and shattered. Why would he ask that if he really was interested? Am I wrong to assume that his calls and texts and attention meant something?
I need to go buy a tub of ice cream. I didn't realize how much I liked him until my heart dropped when I realized what he was asking.
Help.
The One Timer: Over and Out
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
200% Chance of Failure.
Last semester I had what I guess you could call a substantial crush. At least, I liked him enough to legitimately want to date him. Now this is actually saying a lot. As every girl knows, a fleeting crush is a common occurrence. But when, after careful observation, we are still interested in dating "said crush," *life/love/dreams take on meaning again.
Which is exactly why I was worried about Christmas break.
In other words, absence rarely makes the heart grow fonder where pre-relationships are concerned.
So, although Sigmund and I went out a few times and were showing mutual interest in eachother previous to break, I feared the fizzle. Would we even talk over break? Would I even like him when I came back?
Yes and Yes.
Sigmund and I were able to keep up quite a perfect amount of conversation over our 3 weeks apart. We did not obsessively text, thus causing one of us to lose interest. Nor did we refrain from any conversation whatsoever. Instead, there was a small amount of texting combined with a few random calls here and there. By the time I got back to Provo, I had talked with him enough that we didn't feel awkward contacting each other and I was stoked to see him again!
Of course, I only say this in hindsight, as I have now been back 4 days and he has contacted me everyday.
So, although I didn't think it possible, I beat the odds. Despite my 200% increased chance of failure, my crush survived. Now we just have to wait and see if Sigmund and I will survive the next test: semester overload. Here's to hoping for a crush that actually goes relationship.
The One Timer: Over and Out.
*this is slightly dramatized to add appeal.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)